with exposure over time uh your emotional reaction to anything will dissipate. So, we know pleasure. Um, how many of us have, you know, eaten a whole gallon of ice cream? The first bite is really good. By bite 19, we're starting
to feel sick to our stomach, right? Um, and that's kind of just habituation. Like, no emotional experience, whether good or bad, quote unquote, um, lasts forever. Um so by allowing yourself to
to be with uh discomfort over time it gets more comfortable. Now I do want to caution there are some things that should never get comfortable. So for example you should never get comfortable with people physically abusing you. Thank you. >> Uh you should never uh get comfortable
with being traumatized. Uh what we're really talking about are those things that not fear but anxiety where we have kind of um learned to be afraid or to anticipate uh being afraid with
something that doesn't really isn't really harmful to us. So I think it is important to differentiate that. Um the technique I like to use um a lot is the what if so what
technique. So one of the most common uh patterns of thinking for people who are anxious is what if what if this happens what if she says that well what if like what if I run out of money like what if what if what if what if what if they're in the future the anxiet looking
in the future causes the anxiety. >> That's right. And so the thing about a what if question is it always beggets another what if. And so what I like to do in session with clients is they they may start with a what if and my response
is well so what if that happens. So so what if what if you came home today and your husband and or wife or partner or spouse said that they wanted a divorce >> like what would you do? And what we do is is we actually kind of roleplay our
way through all of these fair fantasies where for every what if we stop and pause. I then ask them, "So what would what would you do?" And one of the things we have to remember is underlying most anxiety is a sense of uncertainty.
Now to your point, it would be great if people could ride through that. >> That's the goal. >> That's the goal. Um, but if you can't, then what we can do is we can engage in some problem solving, which is, okay, if my spouse came home today and said that he was going to leave me, what would I
do? Well, I would probably cry. I'd probably, you know, throw things. I would probably, you know, um, wonder if I could afford to live. Great. So, for each of those things that you're afraid of, >> that's wonderful. Yeah. Cognitive. >> We would we would we would do some
problem solving around. Okay. So, what would you So, if So, what would you do if you didn't think you could pay your bills? Well, I would look at my bills. I would look at like how much do I make? Um, so we would kind of break down uh the tasks and we we're also doing a kind
of exposure because we're exposing you to the possibility that something could happen. >> Um, >> preparation. >> That's right. Um, and then another kind of strategy that goes along with that when someone does a what if is to then respond with how probable is that? How
likely is it that your husband is going to leave you today? >> I love in DBTV we call that checking the facts. Checking the facts. See what's what's true and what's probably. >> Yeah. So that's I think one of my favorite techniques related uh to kind of thinking about anxiety. >> Wonderful. No, it's wonderful to talk
and it gives a person a sense of security realizing they they worked it through and they understand it's not as bad as they thought. >> Yeah, I think I think it also empowers people because they're now learning a skill which is problem solving and I think a lot of our clients come to us
without just basic problem solving skills. >> No, that's very true. >> Um >> that's very true. And you know, as you well know, the most important step in any problem solving approach is identifying the problem accurately.
>> Um, and you know, we have lots of people who come to see us saying that they're coming for one reason, but come to find out there's actually a more root cause reason. Um, >> I know I always tell people from borrowing from Dr. Dan Seagull, you know, if you can name it, you can tame it. It takes out a lot of the anxiety
when you know what you're dealing with as opposed to all people have like it's like a black a more a big black cloud over their head. I'm just very upset. You know, they don't even know what they're upset about. There's chronic anxiety of well what is it? This that and once you understand exactly what it
may not even be the election anxiety or the climate crisis anxiety or or the relationship anxiety might be something they're worried about their heart that they have a heart condition. They have to talk about it. So, you know, yeah, finding out what the deal, what's going on, and then naming it, and then we can deal with it better. Absolutely. >> Yeah.
>> In terms of coping, I I just uh want to we we have time just briefly. There's I'm I guess I'm into the physical stuff. I'm into physical stuff. So, there's three positions that I teach people to help them calm down when they're having the anxiety on a physical level. So, one of them is you put put the uh
reparenting position, putting your hand dominant hand on the heart, the other hand on the on the naval area. And just this position can be very soothing for some people more than others. There's other ones to use if you don't like it. And you hold yourself as if you close your eyes and you know the body doesn't know that it's your hands. Even it can be like just comforting and soothing.
It's reparing. If you never got the comfort and and unconditional love and regard you got as a child, you can start giving it to yourself. Learning how to comfort yourself. And just rocking gently can be very soothing. That works for some people. For some people arms and this is borrowing from EMDR and the
you know the EMDR butterfly. There's a whole world on this but the basic one is some people get comfort. We we do this tapping thing which helps bilateral brain stimulation which helps people say we say some positive affirmative things and negative and we work it through or arm rubbing like this arm rubbing for
some people is very soothing if you're watching try it and if you're not driving listen rubbing your arms for those of you who are listening I'm rubbing my arms up and down taking deep breaths and as I do it even I feel relaxed it helps third way is thighs so you just sit that you're sitting in a chair and you're just rubbing from your
thighs to your knees thighs to your knees taking deep breaths the whole time you on clutch. So, one of those techniques might be a good fit for you. And in the moment, I'm we're talking about, you know, the cognitive piece is very important, but I I'm also looking at the in the moment. What can I do to
calm myself down now? And those so review this chest reparing position, arms and thighs, very helpful for anxiety. >> Yeah. Two of my other favorite uh techniques, one is uh curiosity. So
being curious about the anxiety. So I like to teach my clients the who, what, where, when, and how. So what when does your anxiety emerge? When does it go away? How long does it last?
Um how does it move in your body? um >> who does it seem to go up with when you're around them and who seems to be calming for you? >> Where does it happen? Like where in your body does it happen?
>> Huge. That's really huge. >> Um but then also like physically where like where are you located that it happens uh and doesn't happen. Um, so I think just being curious about your anxiety starts to create some diffusion uh or
distance uh between uh it and you. Um, and then I think the other one that I really like is what we call examining the evidence. Mhm. >> So, for example, if you're anxious about somebody not liking you, say you think
your best friend no longer likes you, well, what is the evidence that your friend actually doesn't like you anymore? Um, and part of the reason to do that is we often times jump to conclusions without having uh, as you said earlier, the facts. And so by
taking a step back and kind of looking at what evidence are we using to confirm that this awful thing is actually happening. Um and does that piece of evidence prove a different point better?
So let me give you a concrete example. So, I was working with a guy named Sam who came to me because he was experiencing anxiety. And I asked Sam first and foremost um well, what's the evidence that um that
you're anxious? Um and he said, "Well, um I feel twitchy." And I said, "Okay, so if you're feeling twitchy, like what does that say about you?" "Well, it says that there's something wrong with me." And I then said, "Well, if there is in fact something wrong with you, what does that say about you? That I'm worthless.
That I'm no good." >> There it is. >> And I said, "Oh, >> that's a big leap. >> That's really interesting." I said, "What is the evidence that you're worthless?" >> And he said, "Well, every day my dad would come home plastered.
He would take his belt out of his belt loop. He would crack his belt and he would hunt." He used the word hunt. He would hunt each of us and hit us with the belt. >> Oh. >> And that for him, what he internalized from that is I'm a worthless piece of
>> Yes. >> And I said, "All right. Does that proves another point better? The fact that your father hit you and abused you? Does the fact of that prove a different conclusion better than you're a
worthless piece of shit?" and he kind of sat back in his chair and he said, "Yeah, my dad's an asshole." And all of a sudden the anxiety >> kind of really dissipated for me. >> Unclutched. I got it. I know. That's a great example. So, >> yeah.
>> So, I like examine the I like examine the >> my my phrase for that is let's be curious not furious. >> So, going back and looking at the childhood, I I do not advocate the blame game in my practice. We don't blame the parents. Even the even the crushing alcoholic alcoholics, they did the best
they could back there. That's another basic presupposition for lowering the anxiety and the victim consciousness. So they did like that young man's father did the best he could given the skills he had and what he knew what how to work and how to work through his frustrations. It's very sad. And I
borrow from Tick Nan Hot who talks about idiot compassion >> that when people are doing acting out they're they're idiots and they're not really doing it to me. They're just doing it. They do it to everybody, right? So anyway, that helps lower the anxiety when you have idiot compassion for people and you're able to say
they're doing the best they can. Even this is a very shabby dad, you know, and that's um being curious and not furious. It doesn't I guess there's a point you have to let some of the anger out. But then after a certain point, we got to go into I work with them to get into the radical acceptance and compassion mode because it's more comfortable and less
stressful. Yeah. >> You know, hating what the parents did not helpful. >> Yeah. >> You know. Yeah. So before we wrap up, if you could just describe like one book you would recommend an audience member like take a look at. >> We didn't even get to it today. Um the
food good food good mood book I wanted to recommend. I'm going to read it right. I'm going to say it right now. There's a gal in Boston. Her name is Dr. Uma Nu. I'll spell it. U M A last name is N A D O. Love her book called This is Your Brain on Food. And then her second
book, Calm Your Mind with Food. Okay. Because folks, if you're eating a ton of sugar and caffeine and additives and stuff, it's going to make your brain like very anxious. So, the food solution, we didn't get to it today. Maybe we'll do another show on that because I have a lot to say about that.
So, um, Dr. Uma and also, um, her Harvard neurologist um, and Gary Null, PhD in nutrition, wrote good food, good mood in the 80s. So, anyway, that's my pitch. I'm going to share those are my two favorite books right now for what we didn't get to talk about. >> Yep. and I'm going to share uh Judson
Brewer's Unwinding anxiety. Uh he is a psychiatrist and substance abuse specialist uh who works out of Brown University. So that's my >> good to know. I might want to read that one. Yeah. >> Yeah. And Uma and I do happen to she was a chef prior to becoming a psychiatrist. >> Yeah. >> And not not to drop names, she's also
Harvard trained, but um she was a chef, so she knows a lot about food. Anyway, so those are some good references. Maybe we'll do another show on food and mood. I mean, if you feel like it. It's a big topic for me. So, any any closing words of wisdom before we wrap up for today? >> No, I'm going to just tell we're going to wrap today. Thank you again for your
wisdom and your excellent um suggestions today. We have to remember to have compassion for ourselves, self-compassion, and you know, being able to allow yourself to feel the feelings and then move on without judgment. That's what I can say. Don't judge yourselves. Don't judge yourself for your anxiety. All right.
So, this is this has been process recordings with Lisa Wesson and >> Heath High Tower. And I want to say good health is wealth. Go for it. You deserve to have more inner peace and more calm and more joy. Have a great day. We'll see you next time. >> Take care everybody.
Process Recordings is produced by Lisa Wesson and Heath High Tower with technical support from Chumsford Teledia, the community media center of Chumsford, Massachusetts. Derek. Derek,
>> go wash up and grab your sister. >> Okay. But first, Where's grandma? >> Hey, mama. Mom. >> I'm worried about mom. >> Mom, she's fine. >> These the ones, right, Mom?
>> Yeah. Groundlings. >> Sweet potatoes. >> Sweet potatoes. Daddy, it's salty. >> Grandma's just getting old. Some things come with age.
>> And some don't. >> Early detection of Alzheimer's can lead to better care for your loved one. >> Add two eggs. >> Learn the early warning signs at 10signs.org. Good evening everybody and thank you for joining us for the closed community um
coalition meeting. It's November 20th and my name is Anand Lennox and I'm here with a smattering of some of our steering committee members and I'm going to give everybody a chance to introduce themselves. >> I'm Ben Craft. Uh professionally I'm the vice president for community engagement at the Center for Human Development and
a fairly new member of the uh coalition. >> Brian Kasa with LCTV. Um and we have some students taking care of today's meeting. Lisa Taylor Kelly. Um, I'm a pediatric hospitalist at Bay State.
>> Emily Fialki. I'm a multilingual school psychologist. >> Andrew Healey, physician at Connecticut Children's Hospital. >> Thanks everybody. So, the presentation I'm showing tonight is primarily a showcase of what we've accomplished this
fall and also to let parents know what kind of supports or services we offer for parents in particular. Um but first I just wanted to start off if anybody was not familiar is just going over the mission of the close community and it is to collaborate collaboratively initiate coordinate and sustain prevention and
intervention efforts that reduce youth youth substance use and abuse within the town of Long Meadow. Um how we do that is through a variety of ways but some of the examples is by increasing access and reducing barriers to protective factors. Protective factors are anything that you can identify that help promote healthy
growth for kids. So like access to athletics, you know, clean water, that sort of stuff. Evaluating and monitoring risky behaviors among youth and sharing data with the community. So one of those examples would be like the school climate survey where we track trends in substance use and mental health measurements. Um establishing and
strengthening collaboration among local stakeholders such as the meeting that we have here with all these people. Um understanding the diversity of the community and striving to include all. Facilitating collaborative fundraising, grant writing, and programming among coalition members. and then researching evidence-based practices and sharing
data, information, and resources. So, now I'm going to go into what we've done this fall so far. Um, this is some pictures from what was the distracttology study that we partnered with UMass to pull off. So about a year and a half ago, my predecessor um
reached out to UMass and met with this professor um Anuj Pradam who works in the engineering department and they've had ownership of this huge trailer for the last 5 years um and it's called the Distractology um trailer basically and
inside of it there's two driving simulation labs and um what we did is once we knew the funding was secured um this past October we scheduled three days right before Halloween we recruited a whole bunch students, permitted drivers and ones with driver's licenses.
UMass was able to provide a stipen to each student. So, they got $50 for their participation. And what they would do is they would go in, do a quick pre-ervey, and they would sit behind basically a video game version of a car. They'd buckle themselves in, and then they would put on goggles that mimicked what
your vision looks like when you're impaired by THC. And the reason that we were doing this is because one, we think it raises awareness about the dangers of getting behind the wheel when you're impaired by anything. We know that marijuana has been legalized in Massachusetts for a long time and so it's not a stretch to know that there's
more out there and there's probably more people driving under the influence. Um, and also UMass is using this data to to do an actual study. So they're going to be able to feed us the results later and let us know what they were actually measuring was like student perceptions of the risk. So they do a pre-ervey before the students got behind the wheel
with the goggles. So they we just wanted to know the baseline like how risky do you think this is and then they do the simulation and then they would feed offer their feedback after the fact. So it was really good. Um one of the things that was exciting about it is we got a lot of media coverage from it. So that
was really nice. Um and it was very successful. So we were really happy to do it. The other perk that came from it is once we did this it was a very public event and I had nine new freshmen show up to our stand um club. the the following week which was really nice and that's our students together against
negative decisions. So it was really nice. Um but of course um I did go on to social media because mostly because I wanted to um promote the the coverage that we got let people know that this is important topic and I was surprised but
not not really surprised but that one of the reasons we do this type of work is because public perception is still that driving while impaired by cannabis is not that risky. And a lot of their feedback was like they probably drove even better. Um, and that uh what else?
Drove stoned once while waiting for the stop sign to turn green. And laughing my butt off, people stoned drive better than people sober all day. You might catch them stopped at a sign too long, but they at least aren't running them. Um, so anyhow, we have some more work to
do as far as changing the hearts and minds of everybody, but um, we definitely want to let our younger drivers know that, you know, any impairment is not safe when you get behind the wheel. So, the other thing that we did this fall that was a lot of fun and I think had a good impact is we partnered with
the Long Meadow Police Department and Tapestry Health and we would have Brian Ash show up at almost every event. And what you see here is we're at the Long Meadow shops um doing um Narcan or Nlloxxone distribution and small like really short training sessions for
anybody who comes by. We had a lot of nice people stop by. Some were parents with kids and they just wanted them to be aware of it. We had some people that shared that they had a sister who was struggling and had an elderly parent who wanted to know how to help her in case anything went wrong. Um, and then one thing that was really informative for me
because I hadn't thought of this population before, we had a gentleman stop by who was an Uber driver and he wanted to start carrying it because he had been in a car accident because somebody overdosed and crashed into his vehicle and he was there when the first responders came and he found it so kind
of >> scary that he wanted to make sure he was prepared. Um he also had he wasn't on duty at the time and he had his son in the car with him and so he brought his son with him so that he could learn about nlloxxone as well. So I thought that was that was kind of amazing. So
these are just more pictures. So we did this in the fall, we did it in the spring. Um I've also been tableabling at the farmers market and we've done tableabling at every open house that was available for the elementary schools, the middle schools, the high school. We didn't get too much foot traffic, but the people that would come by were
really interested. And so, um, we probably added like 15 names to our mailing list. Not a lot, but it was good. And, um, I became really good at multitasking. So, I would table, have some candy out there, and then work on my laptop so that there was really no time lost, but it was it was great. And anybody who's watching this, we invite
you to come by anytime. We're going to do the Narcan distribution um, every May and every September. So, it'll be an ongoing thing. Uh the other thing that we offered for parents um and this was a first-time offering for us is we partnered with this group called mass um partners for youth and this was a paid
offering so it was free to parents but the coalition did put funding up so that we could offer these virtual on like not virtual sorry virtual presentations for parents and the reason we went this way was because we do survey our parents and a lot of them say that they don't have time to do inerson events so we figured let's do one after dinner so we would
run this from 7:00 to 8:15 and it was challenging ing to get um adults to participate. The first two ended up being cancelled because the organization required 40 registrants in order for it to run. We were a little surprised because one was on vaping and the other was on marijuana and we thought that those would be interesting for the age
of parents and the the students we serve. But um our third one did go. We had 36 registered. Um only five attended though, which was a very small number. Um but that was a really good one. the gentleman who led it has 30 years of experience in health education and he brought up some really interesting
nuances to like how parents can talk to their kids about substances. And then the last one was just last night we had 50 registered in the end and we had eight people attend. So still really small numbers um but that was why the company was telling us they're like that's why we require a big number
because we found that if you ask for 40 you'll be lucky if you get 10. >> So um but this is some of the stuff that we did this fall. The other thing I want to make sure that caregivers are aware of because I'm always surprised when I go to parent advisory council meetings that a lot of people haven't heard of this is this program that's been around
um it's not really like a close coalition offering. It's more like a district offering, but we work really closely with um Shelley Warren who's the substance use response coordinator for the district. And Safe Homes is basically a private directory that anybody can join. It's really geared
towards parents of 6th through 12th grade students. And what it is is it's a non-binding pledge where you just say that like if there's any social gathering with teenagers at your house, you're not going to serve drugs and alcohol. Um it's it's illegal. It can put you at a risk of being um liable
under the social host law where if anybody gets injured, there can be fines and penalties and even jail time. But more importantly, what it is is it's just a way for parents to have access to other families that also agree to not serving alcohol so that they have a little network of people they can talk
to. And this year, um, it's been a while during COVID, there weren't many gatherings. But since we're a few years past CO now, this December, um, we are going to be hosting a small little gathering for the people that signed up just with some light refreshments and a chance to just like talk about how their kids are doing and kind of create a
community within a community. Um, and then in addition to that, we've done communitywide campaigns where we just try to reach a lot of people with some messages that we think are important. So these two here both basically talk about the social host law because it's important for parents to
know that though it's legal to offer your own child alcohol, like there's there's no law barring a parent from saying, "I would like to, you know, have my child have wine with me." But if you offer your child's friend wine, that's when it does become illegal. And so we want to make sure parents are aware of
this. And we also just want to promote healthy choices for kids because as we know young people and alcohol, especially if there's driving involved, it can be uh really tragic and we want to prevent those things from happening. So these are some of the educational mailings we send out. And we do try to make it positive. Like we let parents
know from surveys and from what kids say that like most parents don't allow teen drinking. Like you know, you're in the majority, you're already doing the right thing, but just here's some information to know. Um, we've also been doing education around Nlloxxone. Nlloxxone, um, I was surprised when I would meet
with certain groups of people and they would they would know what it was, but they would think that it was in some ways not safe. And so I've been doing a lot of education around like this is an opioid reversing medication. It's completely safe. There's really no adverse effects. Um, you can give it to somebody who's not overdosing and it
won't do anything to them. um it's strictly designed to, you know, take opioids and knock them off the receptor and reverse an overdose. So, we've been providing education about this um primarily just by letting people know what it is in simple terminology um and trying to spread it as far as wide. So,
this was a mailing that we did for K through 12 families in the district. And then, um to kind of finish threading the needle, you know, we've done education for for students, we've done education for parents. Um, but then that's not the only people who live in
Long Meadow. We also have people of various generations. So, one of the things that we're doing this December on the 1 and the 3 is we were lucky enough to get Dr. Ari um Creggsman to agree to do a couple talks for us at the adult center. and he's going to talk primarily
about how the field of medicine has really changed how they approach substance use disorders try to normalize Nlloxxone and also talk a little bit about how um senior generations do need to be cautious and it would be a really good idea to have Nlloxxone around because a lot of them are on opioid painkillers and sometimes you can lose
track of dosages or you might be on different medications and there's just risks that are inherent with um with getting older and and also we know that there can be intergenerational exposure to opioids. So like you might have a grandchild that you need to raise because maybe you have a child that suffered with an opioid use disorder. So
we're excited to have him coming on board and that's open to the public. It's at the adult center but anybody can go. Um and then we also do a lot of youth leadership training. So Shelley Warren or again I've mentioned before used to run the students together against negative decisions um chapter
here at the high school. Um but she stepped down when I came on board and so this has been my new project and I'm excited. We have 35 students that have joined. um they were really integral for the distraology project. We had a bunch of students volunteer the tables, do check-in. A lot of the students also signed up to to be part of the driving
study. Um they also did their first presentation today at Mr. Baker's education uh health ed class at Williams Middle School. They did a great job. We had four students who presented on social norms. So they just kind of asked students, "How many kids do you think use these drugs?" And the kids would
overestimate and then they would talk about what the real data is. And there was a lot of um activities that they did together. It was really nice. Um and then we are going to be starting in the spring also doing some lessons for fifth graders. Not necessarily on substances. We're going to find out what the health educators think would be an important
thing for high school students to reinforce for their younger peers. So it might be decision-m. It might be choosing friends um and stuff like that so that we can help um get them can make healthy decisions from a young age. Um the other thing that we did is we recently started what we call a scan
junior club. that's running at Glenbrook and we meet on Mondays and the students there, we have about eight in that one. It's a smaller group, but there are a bunch of actors and actresses. So, the first projects that we're going to work on are skits that they're going to videotape and do voiceovers. And um there was an agreement on the topic
we're going to start with. So, we're doing a few different topics. One is going to three kids are going to cover bullying, another two are going to do gender discrimination, and then the other group is going to do um self-esteem and self-image. So, and we're not sure what we're going to do with the videos yet, but we're excited that they're excited about we're doing
the work. Um, then, uh, we're getting towards the end of our presentation. This is just, um, some handouts that I created with the help of, um, the New England Highensity Drug Trafficking Association. Um, we did a training at
um, the uh, Southern New Hampshire University back in September and I led a workshop on how to get vape prevention and education into your schools. And um, what we ended up sharing out at the end of that was different resources to help other communities do the similar work. So we have community resources to the
left, individual resources. So that's like my life might quit and not on tobacco, the truth initiative. Like so if you are somebody who's vaping and you need help quitting, that's where you can go. um and then what families can can do together and then um programs that work in schools such as catch my breath,
check and connect in depth, that sort of stuff. So that was really fun. I don't get to do a lot of PD for other coalition personnel, but that was an opportunity I had that was really fun. Um and then the other thing that's coming up is this spring we're going to
have an offering for caregivers. It's going to be held during the 8th grade parent night which is on Thursday, February 26th. If anybody is the parent of an eighth grader um who is going to be attending this, we're going to have a panel of um adults who are parents to
either seniors or perhaps recent alum graduates of the high school and they're going to be there to answer questions and offer advice on different topics. One of them is just sort of like how to handle things when things aren't going well. Um how high school is a safe place to fail. There's a lot of scaffolding there, like you don't have to be your
perfect self during these four years. um executive functioning and organization, uh normalizing stress, how it's normal, can even be good, how to help your students learn to manage it, and then like how to navigate things like my kid doesn't talk to me anymore, how do I still parent them? So, we're excited to
have this in the works, and um we're actively recruiting parents right now. Um and you know, we're looking forward to build on this each year. So, that's our presentation for tonight. I thank everybody who joined us in person and virtually. And um I hope you have a good
night.